The Ever Expanding Web of Relationships

In the last couple of days I have connected with some friends from my past. I talked to my friend Melanie. She and I met when we were in high school at a church leadership event in Chicago. We went to college near one another and stayed in contact until a few years ago. We have talked once in the last three years, until last night. I am in awe of relationships that pick up as if no time had passed at all. That's how my conversation felt last night.

Yesterday afternoon my good friend from seminary, Kevin, stopped by as he was driving through Rochester. We had lunch and talked as always about how we might be used as pastors and servants in the church. We wondered together what the church will look like at the end of our careers and the role of mega-churches in the religious landscape. Heck, in our position, it is hard to know where we will be at this time next year let alone in forty years.

Last night, I gathered with new friends, people who go to the church I serve and we wondered together what it looks like to live out our faith as the letter to the Ephesians spells it out. We wondered if the body of Christ was limited to the Christian church and what that means for our relationship with Jews and Muslims who also confess that God is God. We were challenged by people in the group who wondered if doing the living of faith was more important than the thinking of faith, whether the conversation became to intellectualized. I was really proud of the group for being able to hold a variety of opinions in tension and live together in faithful community. I was amazed by the closeness through faith that I experienced with this group who were relative strangers to me. It seemed that the body of Christ was living in faith together in that coffee shop yesterday afternoon.

Relationships are ever expanding and contrasting. There was a time when I felt like I had a relationship piggy bank and when it was full, I would have to empty some out to keep on making new friends. What a silly idea! Although it is true that it is quite difficult to have really deep relationships with lots of people, our connection to others, our relationship webs are vital to our health and wellness, both physically and spiritually. My heart mourns for the elderly who find themselves lonelier and lonlier as age grows and friends die. I mourn even deeper when our society devalues the elderly because they are unable to do what they were once able to. In the west, we seem to have a very difficult time giving value to people because they are people, God's beloved people. What might it look like if our society slowed down half a pace to recognize the beauty of the other, the life that the other lives and spoke a word of grace and compassion to those who feel the deep despair of loneliness? The letter to the Ephesians talks about the body of Christ which is knit together by ligaments. Shouldn't we as part of the body feel the arthritis of loneliness in another part of our body? My prayer is: Healer of our every ill, fall afresh on me, on this body so that we with you will be alert and attentive to the pain of our own body.

I am so thankful for the body of people who surround me each day, week, month or year. For new relationships and the ones that have been evolving over so many years. The web looks delicate, but in many places is strong and reassuring. Even in those places where it seems the connection is gone, one visit to that place in the web reassures me that mending is possible and in many cases even eagerly awaiting a visit to reconnect and continue the relationship.

For me, I see the body of Christ in every relationship I have. Where there is love and hope and peace, mysteriously Christ is in it. I don't think I'd want it any other way.

Peace to your house.